may 14 2023

Well I failed the exam everyone else in the lifeguard class passed besides me. Then I got home couldn't even park the car in the garage right. My head still hurts and I can't stop crying. I don't know maybe because I still feel alone I can't even get a hug. I can't focus or comprehend stuff like teenagers can I'm sorry I grew too old and I can't even do numbers. I'm retared and slow. I'm not good at anything in life I should have just stuck to hanging out in bar rooms. I can't get no support for anything.my mental state isn't even well I'm sick of being sick. I don't know if I wanna even go back. Well your a make it work company and I just don't work. I didn't cheat like the others. I don't understand what's wrong with me and disability won't even evaluate me either. Lawyers won't take me in I give up. I don't even care what happens to me anymore. I give up there's nothing in life saving me. It's like I'm never find a place where I belong. I'm so done. My head hurts all I can do is write in this stupid box. I wish when I was a kid I could of grew up in a school where I was allowed to work school and do sports or some type of exercise. Instead of just being a single mother who fails at everything in life.theres the stuff they don't see I just want to fall asleep and never wake up again. But then again I am the one who keeps saying I need more training 2days isn't long enough. I need more practice. I'm still tried.