unloved and worthless

Who has showed you that you hold value? Family, work, friends, for me they they all remain zero. Who shares anything good with me? No one. It's facts. What is my purpose? Why must I only have dreams and fantasies, but can't seem to figured out how to have reality? I'm falling down again into the zero given and received. No rights to anything. I'm still going blind over here I can't find nothing to smile about. I'm misery all day everyday. It's supposed to change but it never does. How can I become the opposite? I can't change anything by myself I'm done. I feel like I wanna die goodbye.