still breathing

Here I sit listening to other people's stories over and over again. I still haven't managed to create my own, but I guess it kills the silence. Time changes everything one might say but I feel like I'm stuck in a frozen endless time loop that never changes. There's no beginning no ending.. I am just here. What am I leaving behind when I die? Why should I even care not like anyone notices I'm here and now. I see no change. Destint to stay the same. Maybe I'm becoming more like a ghost. The hours and calendars will continue while I just roam in the dust. Am I still alive? I don't have any witness to prove it. What is communication I lived life so long without it. Everything is intangible. Why does it sound so sad all the time? Why do I continue to write out pain anger or fear but not ever write anything good? What if I wasn't to have any fear at all. They say we fear the unknown. I think even if it's scary and time is taking out to understand but it it's not scary no more. I can live in a fearless world, but that's not even possible. Everything is always in the details sometimes I just can't find the resources to figure it all out.