what's wrong with me this is...

Always feeling disconnected like I'm not able to receive the right kind of help. There's a lack of support in my life. Why should I always have to make a suggestion or ask for it? why can't I just receive the support I need? This always ends up being the results of my sadness. Still I always carry all the weight of everything and proceed forward. I just keep keeping that I could change this but I can't do it alone. This is always how I become a failure. Even when I try so hard to do all this by myself in the end it never works because your not being supportive. So to anyone out there who wants to see me improve anything then be what I need to better myself and my life. I will do my best to share the samething with you. It can be from small helping hands to larger tasks. It can be from love to hate friendships, families, work and fun. It also can be from communication or physical duties. Simple things like just making someone smile, or larger things like paying for something, or even building something new. One thing I know about myself is I constantly seeking and waiting for this to happen. I continue to do everything on my own but it really does bother me that I never feel like I get the support I need. I'm still waiting.......